Smell ya later, 2016.

As always... the Year in Review: 2016

What did you do in 2016 that you'd never done before?

Not much, sadly. I tried a sensory deprivation tank (I would do it again!) which was pretty cool. I taught Drawing for the first time exclusively as a course. We took Noah to a waterpark in Wisconsin Dells. I experienced divorce in my immediate family. I went on a Ceramics retreat (though cut short by illness and bad weather- boo!) I journaled every day of 2016. Spent a night away from Noah and Jordan. Celebrated two years of nursing Noah (I'm waiting for him to decide that we're done- I never thought we'd make it this long!) That's all I can think of off the top of my head. I should keep better track of new experiences. 

Did you keep your New Year's resolutions, and will you make more for next year?

According to this survey last year, I only had one goal for 2016: "to have more balance in my life. To more equally devote energy to myself, my marriage, and my kid." I think I did a good job of giving more time to myself, I could probably still work more on the marriage bit. It's really easy to let days or even weeks go by before Jordan and I look at each other and realize we haven't had a meaningful conversation that goes beyond who is going to pack Noah's lunch and what household chores need to be done. So yeah, there's always work to be done there.

My goals for 2017:

I don't know if I have one. I've spent the last ten minutes sitting here and writing a sentence or two, then deleting it, then writing something else and deleting that too. 2017 is a huge question mark. I'm scared for our country. I'm scared for my minority students and their families. We have an egotistical demagogue entering the most powerful position in the world and I'm still not over the shock that my fellow citizens elected him willingly. It's so easy to say THEY elected him (the conservatives, republicans, right, whatever) but the truth is that WE elected him. I am not separate from the other people in the US, I am a part of it. And I don't understand how so many people could elect someone so despicable, and I'm trying to understand. I feel enormous privilege for the opportunities I have been given, and I feel enormous responsibility to do everything I can to ensure that I can make our school, the community, our world a better place. I have never felt so much despair about the state of our world and I can't tell if it's because things are really that bad, or it's because I'm getting older and maybe slightly less self-absorbed and am finally paying more attention.

So, yeah. I guess that's not really a goal. I just hope that at the end of 2017 I can breathe a little and say that things aren't as bad as I feared they would be. 

Did anyone close to you give birth?

If my Facebook feed is any indication, everyone had babies this year. My whole facebook wall is a sea of babies and cats and I love it. Many of my friends had their second baby! I feel like I'm still getting used to having one and they're moving on to #2!

Did anyone close to you die?

Well, we lost way too many celebrity icons in 2016 but I can't technically say I was close to any of them. 

What countries did you visit?

None, AGAIN! But I DID renew my passport, and we got one for Noah too so we're ready to be jet-setting!

What would you like to have in 2017 that you lacked in 2016?

More time alone with Jordan. We used to be able to go on trips or out on dates spontaneously and now everything needs to be so meticulously planned. Our google family calendar is invaluable! We just need to make time together a priority on there.

What date(s) from 2016 will remain etched upon your memory, and why?

Well, November 8th was a pretty big shitshow. I had a nice day at school, went out to the movies that night with my department colleagues, and went to bed at 2:30am in a total state of shock.

What was your biggest achievement of the year?

I feel like I got to do a lot of personally fulfilling things this year. I taught summer ceramics with my colleague, Carrie, which was a lot of work but also lots of fun. I've taken on more responsibilities and leadership roles at school. It's time-consuming, but it's stuff I care about and I'm hopeful that it does make a positive impact. I've actually started reading books again! I definitely improved my self-care this year, though there's always room for improvement there too.

What was your biggest failure?

I don't like the word 'failure' because it just seems so final. I guess my biggest on-going challenge is the need to work more on my health- eating better and exercising more.

Did you suffer illness or injury?

A few nasty colds which lasted for weeks. Noah had hand, foot, and mouth disease which sucked but luckily no one else in our family got it.

What was the best thing you bought?

A silicone muffin pan. Noah loves muffins and this pan makes cleaning up about a million times easier.

Whose behavior merited celebration?

Noah is turning into a very sweet and kind person, which I'm proud of. He's still got his stubborn moments, but on the whole he's so good-natured. Jordan is still awesome at putting up with me and my own stubborn moments too. And I really love my Art department colleagues, Lyz, Sarilis, and Carrie. They make me feel so supported at school. Plus, they're hilarious.

Whose behavior made you appalled and depressed?

Donald Trump. The whole situation at Standing Rock.

Where did most of your money go?

Jordan could tell you all about this. At the beginning of 2016 he used the app You Need a Budget to create a budget for our family. He did an amazing job with it and I'm sure we're richer now, which I'm very thankful for because talking about money has never been super interesting to me.

What did you get really, really, really excited about?

We went on a family trip to Kalahari resort in Wisconsin Dells this summer, which I was excited about. It was a really fun time and I loved watching Noah play in the water! I'm currently really excited about the upcoming release of the live-action Beauty and the Beast. Yes, you can make fun of me.

What song will always remind you of 2016?

Noah was super into Frosty the Snowman this December so that's been in my head for about a month.

Compared to this time last year, are you:

i. happier or sadder?

Hard to say. Some things are a lot harder, some things are a lot better. Maybe it's a wash.

ii. thinner or fatter?

I think I'm about the same. Consistency is good, I guess.

iii. richer or poorer?

We have a bit more money coming in, and we are (well, mainly Jordan is) doing a better job of managing where it goes, so richer.

What do you wish you'd done more of?

Exercise. Creative projects.

What do you wish you'd done less of?

Reading/watching garbage on the internet. Paying attention to the media circus around the election.

Did you fall in love in 2016?

Same two guys. Still love'em.

What was your favorite TV program?

Jordan and I both loved Stranger Things. I liked Black Mirror too though it was too over the top, even for me sometimes. We hardly watch any TV now that we don't have cable anymore, just Netflix and Hulu. I started watching Ink Master and I'm kind of convinced that my next career should be a tattoo artist.

Do you hate anyone now that you didn't hate this time last year?

Hate is a strong word. But I really don't respect the moral character of our president-elect. I'm considering just not telling Noah about what a president is until he's out of office.

What was the best book you read?

I liked the Girl on the Train. I started the year reading a whole bunch of Beverly Clearly, which led to me reading a bunch of Judy Blume, then before I knew it, it was April and I'd read all the American Girl books. I guess I needed some light and easy reading, and it was nice to revisit some of my favorite books from childhood. I also liked It's Okay to Laugh (Crying is Cool Too) but Nora Purmort. I think there were some more... I should look at my library check-out history. I read more books in 2016 than 2015, so that's a plus!

What was your greatest musical (re)discovery?

I still haven't found a new band or artist that I just really can't get enough of. 

What did you want and get?

I bought myself a Spire breathing monitor a few days ago. It keeps track of your breathing patterns and signals you when you're tense. I'm hoping it will help with mindfulness.

What did you want and not get?

I have wanted a DSLR camera for years but just haven't gotten one yet. I guess I don't want it enough to make it happen.

What was your favorite film of this year?

I didn't see a ton of movies this year. Jordan and I went to Zootopia which was cute, and I saw the Girl on the Train. I can't think of any others off the top of my head.

What did you do on your birthday, and how old were you?

I turned 34. I had a really nice day at school. My colleagues and students were super thoughtful and it was just a good day. I took Noah to the homecoming parade after school which was fun. We had pizza and cupcakes at home. The next day I spent an hour in a sensory deprivation tank. It was great to have no stimulation- no lights, obligations, questions, worries- for an hour. 

What one thing would have made the year immeasurably more satisfying?

More compassion and empathy, in general. 

How would you describe your personal fashion concept in 2016?

Forever t-shirts and jeans. Less maternity clothing this year, so that's good I guess.

What political issue stirred you the most?

Let's talk in person.

Who did you miss?

Always my friends and family in MN. I often wish that everyone would just move here. Madison is awesome- everyone loves it, including us! 

Who was the best new person you met?

Courtney, Sarilis' long-term sub in our Art department. She's into Ceramics, she's sarcastic, and she likes snacks. Instant friend.

Tell us a valuable life lesson you learned in 2016:

This was a hard year in big and small ways. The country is going through a lot, so much hate, bigotry, willful ignorance. Our family went through a lot, divorce, depression, illness. I guess I'm feeling a bit more lost and confused at the end of this year than I was twelve months ago. But I'm also an optimist, and I am always trying to see the good in every situation. The positives that we can work toward and goals to create. Sometimes I have to look harder than others and 2016 has made it pretty tough. Tonight is New Year's Eve and this has always been my favorite holiday. I love the feeling of a clean slate, starting over, new possibilities. I know that tomorrow morning won't magically erase all the crap that is happening in the world, but maybe it will bring some new attitudes. New hope. New drive for change and action. I know the gyms will be full at least.